Yesterday I went home at 06:30 PM, way too early compared to the past days when I arrived home at 09:30 PM at the earliest.
I had a splitting headache. From the heat, maybe. I heard from the morning news that the temperature was something like 34 degrees Celsius. That and the fact that it's been a long day.
After treating myself to a Cheese Burger, fries and a McFlurry, I immediately snuggled to bed. The idiot box (read: the television) beckoned but the shows were too dull. I thus just plugged in the speaker for my iPod iTouch and listened to Enya's soothing songs, hoping they would lull me to sleep. No such luck.
Not up to continue reading any of the three books that I am currently reading, I rummaged through my shelf and found an old issue of Reader's Digest. And that's when I found my destressor for the day.
It's the September 2007 issue, the 4th Annual Humor Special. And boy, was I greatly entertained.
Below are some of the jokes that made my day yesterday. Laugh on.
I had a splitting headache. From the heat, maybe. I heard from the morning news that the temperature was something like 34 degrees Celsius. That and the fact that it's been a long day.
After treating myself to a Cheese Burger, fries and a McFlurry, I immediately snuggled to bed. The idiot box (read: the television) beckoned but the shows were too dull. I thus just plugged in the speaker for my iPod iTouch and listened to Enya's soothing songs, hoping they would lull me to sleep. No such luck.
Not up to continue reading any of the three books that I am currently reading, I rummaged through my shelf and found an old issue of Reader's Digest. And that's when I found my destressor for the day.
It's the September 2007 issue, the 4th Annual Humor Special. And boy, was I greatly entertained.
Below are some of the jokes that made my day yesterday. Laugh on.
From Laughter, the Best Medicine Section:
I have CDO. It's like Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, only it's in alphabetical order as it should be.
Love is a Many Icky Thing
Kids define love the way they figured it out.
Q: How do you decide who to marry?
A: No one really decides before they grow up. God decides it all the way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with.
- Kristen, aged 10
Q: What do you think your mum and dad have in common?
A: Both don't want any more kids.
- Lori, aged 8
Q: What do most people do on a date?
A: On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
- Martin, aged 10
From As Kids See It Section
My sister bought a fish for my eight-year-old son, Germaine and told him to think of a good name for it. He kept coming up with silly names, so she told him to keep thinking.
Finally, on their way home, Germaine said, "This fish already has a name."
"What's its name?" Tawnia asked.
"Sparingly," Germaine replied. "It says right here on the label: FEED SPARINGLY THREE TIMES A DAY."
From Life's Like That
Overheard at a friend's wedding:
Guy Guest 1: "A man never knows what true happiness is until he gets married."
Guy Guest 2: "Yeah, but by then it's too late."
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